Dear Mohmmad Ahmad Khan:

As you prepare to go under the surgeon’s knife, I want you to take this letter with you; this should tell you who you are and what you have to do.

When I heard about the diagnosis, I was least surprised, not because there was anything special about you to deserve this but because I see it so often and so frequently that it is no longer an ailment of surprise (like the pun?). You have lived a straightforward life without too many sins; I mean you do not smoke, chew tobacco, imbibe ethanol, snort cocaine, smoke pot, drive recklessly or do bungee jumping; you also do not believe in having too many girl friends that will break your heart; however, you did like the joys of oral titillation, something, I must admit, I am equally infected with, in addition to many other vices. This lays a foundation to what I am about to say.

Cats have nine lives, that’s what I understood talking to felines; humans get only one but having gone through a realization process, we break it into two innings, two halves, two periods, if you will. You have played your first innings: you did well. You were skipper, you were a captain, and you were a batsman, a bowler. You avoided many bouncers, worked around spins, ducked guglies, dashed to field and ultimately brought your team to win, come what may. You played this first innings for everyone, for the team; now cometh the second innings, which you will play for yourself, for Mohammad Ahmed Khan for one simple reason: the team needs you around to coach this time. You need not field, or run or to hit a six any longer, you have proved it that you can do it. Now those who are entering the field need a coach to tell them how to do it. In the second innings, you will try to be a spectator, a commentator, a motivator and above all a moderator, both for the game and the rules of your life. It is relatively easy for you because you have not gathered too many sins. Here is what you would do religiously: walk 40 minutes every day come rain or shine; give up red meat altogether and literally deprive yourself of things greasy. Is this all bad? you bet; the great smell and taste of piping hot nihari with freshly baked nan is just about as good as it comes to any other pleasure in life; fact, is after a while this supercedes all other pleasures, including the pleasures of procreation. But can you give it up? the answer is yes. And I will tell you why. You will give it all up because in the second innings, the rules of the games are different, now you have to live for others not just for yourself and you are not a selfish man.

Mohammad Ahmad Khan you are good man with a big heart; God could not waste such good hearts on just ordinary mortals; you have touched many lives, you have been kind to many, you have earned the best wishes of many and that’s your bank balance of deeds; now is the time to cash it. And that you will, without knowing it. You have behind you best wishes of a lot of people: not just those who will say but mean it as well. So, take heart, get on with it as quickly as possible.

There is one thing however that I must warn you about. Medical studies show that 90% of men undergoing open heart surgery come out with much improved sex lives; the other 10% percent go bananas afterwards. I do not know what your plans are but consider this a gift of God, if that helps. And yes, the rules of the second innings require you to keep your friends informed about it also.

I, Anjum, Omayr, Ali and Nabiha remember you in our wishes and in our own way pray for your good health.

Best regards.
Sarfaraz